


The Hogwarts Network

by hannahbonanza



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Future Fic, Gen, Harry Potter Next Generation, Internet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-10
Updated: 2014-06-11
Packaged: 2018-02-04 03:16:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1763895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannahbonanza/pseuds/hannahbonanza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hogwarts finally jumps into the 21st century and gets Wi-Fi. Featuring the Next Generation at Hogwarts. Not so much AU as FutureFic, because the internet is inevitable. Featuring James Sirius Potter/OC, Teddy Lupin/Victoire Weasley, and a veritable smorgasbord of cameos from your favorite characters. Rating PG-13 swearing and jokes. Written for my English 301 class for an actual grade (No joke. I'm being graded on this)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Winter Break of the 2020-2021 School Year:

“The internet has indeed consumed much of the idle time of the Muggle World, Mr. Chairman,” said Governor Higgles. “We have seen great strides being made in the fields of academic and social literacy due to internet affiliations and online communities. Relationships of all kinds are being forged across the world and, to be honest Sir, the British Wizarding Community is already falling behind.”  
“It’s true,” interjected Governor Bellson. “Salem introduced the internet into the classroom setting two years ago, to great success.”  
“Sydney, Drumstrang, and Beauxbatons have all also been successful,” stated Governor Folley.   
“Sydney?” cried out Governor Banes, who was known to have a deep-seated loathing for the entire continent of Australia, for reasons that ranged from their convicted criminal origins as a population to a bad surf n’ turf he once had at a seafood restaurant in Melbourne. The general displeasure was echoed through the chamber though. Everyone knew The Sydney School for Magical Mates was far from above par.   
“But we can’t forget the Montreal Academy for Wizarding Sciences,” said Governor Newhome, flicking her wand to distribute the memos of statistics on internet usage in wizarding schools. The governors each received their papers and instantly began mulling them over. “They instated a program and within a month, the entire school had deteriorated into a fantasy hockey league battleground and half of the senior class had to repeat their final year.”  
Silence fell after that startling fact. Except for Governor Banes, who leaned over to ask Governor Rigby what a ‘hockey league’ was and did the fact that it was imaginary in any way lend itself to the fact that the pupils were fighting about it.  
“It is Canada, though,” said Governor Higgles, “And the general statistics don’t lie. Internet programs are successful.”  
“Monty, if this were a question of statistics, you know I’d be on board,” began Governor Newhome, “But the emotional and psychological damage of the internet is hard to argue against. Just look at the cyber bullying. At inappropriate conduct and content. At the decline of academic literacy!”  
“And we can stop those things with careful monitoring and censorship charms!” argued Governor Higgles. He was the youngest and newest member of the Board. Upon graduating early from Hogwarts and making a name for himself in the fields of Academics and the Muggle Internet in the Ministry, he then proceeded to rise quickly through the ranks as a politician and representative of popular opinion. He joined Hogwarts’s Board on the promise of bringing fresh ideas to the table. Priority number one was bringing the internet in to the classroom. “I’ve already gotten money pledged from The Lily Potter Fund and private donors for personal computers for each student and installation of a network around the wards created by the charms surrounding the school. I have spent countless hours compiling information on exactly how we need to go about enabling a network and I’ve gotten the majority of the parents on board with the system-”  
“Monty that is quite enough!” said Chairman Malfoy from his spot at the head of the table. Though he had just yelled at him, he had quite a soft spot for the enthusiastic governor. His ideas were good most days and he was just cheerful enough to pull Draco out of his pre-coffee funk in the mornings. He was still so young, though. “Now, I agree with you.” There was a general outcry from the rest of the board and Draco held out his hands to signal them to calm down. “But I also agree with Esther. We need to address these issues before we allow the students to have full run of the internet. I’ve looked over all the data from both sides, as well as Governor Higgles’s plan, and I have come up with a compromise.   
“Instead of allowing the students free reign, we have an internet-integrated class, only one, designed around introducing the internet to the students. A seventh-year Muggle Studies class. Each student is given a personal computer, the usage of which will be heavily monitored. We will work with Professor Thomas to develop a curriculum for the rest of the school year, which will be considered the trial period for the internet integration. After careful evaluation of student progress and consideration of necessity and usefulness, the Board will determine whether or not to allow a full-capacity system in the school. Thoughts, Headmaster McGonagall?” Inquired Draco, turning to the woman on his right.  
“I agree with Chairman Malfoy. Professor Thomas is more than capable of picking up this curriculum and developing. I also would like to recommend that we move PA Weasley from Charms to Muggle Studies, so she can be of aide to Professor Thomas.”  
“That sounds reasonable. Shall we put it to a vote?” suggested Draco. General supportive murmurs sounded from around the room.  
“All in favor of the trial period for internet integration at Hogwarts, say ay.”  
“Ay,” stated 14 of the 15 governors.  
“All opposed, say nay.”  
“Nay,” stated Governor Newhome.  
“That’s settled then. Unless extenuating circumstances occur, I will see all of you back here in June to evaluate the new policy. Thank you for your service.”

Winter Term, 2020-2021 School Year

“Good morning, students,” said Professor Thomas. “Good morning, Professor Thomas,” the students reiterated before taking their seats. Dean Thomas, current Muggle Studies Professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, took his spot at the front of the room, waving his wand to distribute the stack of laptops from his desk to his pupils’. The thin, shiny electronic devices floated gently to settle on the desks, one for each student. The students, especially those from wizarding families, just stared, wide-eyed, at the silver rectangles, hands kept firmly in their laps. Only the three, brave muggleborns reached out to skim their fingers along the rounded edges.   
“Welcome to the second half of your seventh-year Muggle Studies program. We are implementing a new curriculum this term, focused on the use and culture of the internet in the muggle world. These will be your textbooks. They are called personal computers, or laptops. You will be using them, on loan from the school, for the remainder of the school year. Yes, Miss Weasley?”   
Lucy Meredith Weasley, daughter of Percy and Audrey Weasley, had her hand raised high in the air. She had her father’s know-it-all attitude, which she loved to display prominently in class. The rest of the time, she was all kindness, which she got from her mother. Across the room, her cousin, James Sirius Potter, rolled his eyes and nudged his best friend, Elaine Alexandra Ilia, in the ribs to share his joking contempt for Lucy. In reality, she formed the third side of their tight-knit trio.   
“Sir, I was just wondering how we are supposed to use these laptops for class? Don’t the wards around the school virtually extinguish the electronic capacities of muggle devices?”  
“Excellent question! 5 points to Gryffindor! Yes, all electronic muggle devices besides these will not work on school grounds. These laptops have been specially charmed and programmed to possess a downgraded version of the muggle ‘internet’ and other computer capacities. Essentially, your computers will act like they are from the spring of 2014. The internet, which is a system of interconnected computer networks, on which most of the world’s information can be accessed, is only updated to that time period. Keep that in mind if you are window-shopping through the webpages and come across some muggle world developments from seven years ago.”  
“Um, it’s ‘browsing,’ Sir,” corrected a mousy Hufflepuff named Beatrice Houghton from the second row.  
“Yes, of course, thank you Miss Houghton. Browsing. Now, in order to fully immerse ourselves in internet culture, we must become members of the websites which were most used at this time. Each week, we will use a different website as a case study to analyze the merits and drawbacks of each. You will create and maintain a profile for each website and interact with other users, logging at least five hours of internet time every week. Trust me, you will blow through those with flying colors.   
“Your internet use will be heavily monitored, so please, attempt to keep your browsing appropriate. Many of the websites we will go on will contain highly inappropriate material, which will generally be flagged as such. Avoid these flags if at all possible, but we will mostly be trusting your judgment on such matters. At the end of the term, you can choose whether or not to delete your profiles or maintain them outside of Hogwarts. Yes, Mr. Scamander?”  
A blonde boy with far-off eyes had his hand raised. In a dreamy voice, he said, “Sir, why is the school only just starting this program now?”  
“Well, the Board of Governors has realized that the integration of the internet in to the wizarding world is evitable, so they’ve decided to start a trial program. At the end of this term, your individual progress and reports will be collected and the Board will determine whether or not to make this a permanent program.”  
The door of the office creaked open behind Dean and everyone turned to look. Molly Elizabeth Weasley strolled through, carrying what looked to be half the world’s supply of paper in her arms. Her long red curls fell lazily past her shoulders and her pale blue robes trailed lightly on the floor. As soon as she set down all the papers and fixed her light brown eyes on the class, an audible sigh of longing from the general male population was barely heard, with the exception of James, to whom Molly was directly related, and Wes Peters, whose boyfriend was currently in herbology. James swiveled his head around the room, glaring at his fellow males. “Oh, control yourselves,” he hissed.  
“Thank you, Ms. Weasley,” said Professor Thomas. Molly nodded, smiled, and skirted out of the room, off to help another class. As the current Hogwarts Aide, she was in training to be a professor, mostly by helping the current professors by running errands, grading papers, and teaching when one of them fell ill.  
“I’m assuming most of you know Molly Weasley,” continued Professor Thomas, sitting on his desk now. “She will be helping out a lot with this class and is already quite fluent in computers. Please feel free to visit her, as well as myself, if you have any issues with your assignments.  
“Now, I think we’ve covered the basics. I want you to spend the rest of class playing around with your computers. Feel free to leave and start lunch early. The computers also have a repelling charm cast on them, so food, drink, and other messes should not harm them. For next class, please come back with a Facebook profile created. We will explore Facebook and friend all of your classmates next time. Have fun!” Dean dismissed his students, who each gingerly grabbed a laptop and filed out of the classroom.  
As soon as they were outside, Lucy pulled James and Elaine off to the side and took their laptops out of their hands. “Infragilis,” she said, casting a minor protective charm on each of the three computers. “There. Now they won’t shatter when one of you inevitably knocks them off a desk.”  
“Did Molly tell you to do that?” asked Elaine, taking back her laptop and putting it in her bag. James did the same with his.  
“She just told me the spell last night and said I would need it,” Lucy said, also stowing her computer. “At this point, she’s been right too many times for me to doubt her.” James and Elaine both nodded in agreement.  
“Lunch?” James asked, starting off down the hall while the two girls trailed behind him, talking to each other. James barely paid attention to their conversation and considered what he wanted for lunch instead. There was still a half an hour left in their current period, so they were pretty much the only ones in the halls. As they rounded a corner, they saw Professor Theodore Lupin standing just down the hall. He had this period free and looked worried. He didn’t even notice his pseudo-cousins and their friend until they were standing in front of him.  
“Oh, wotcher,” Teddy said in greeting before drifting off again. He was staring at a portrait of a faun drinking heavily from a goblet.  
“How long has he been here?” James asked the faun. The subject of the oil painting shrugged and hiccupped.   
“About 20 minutes. Or 45. Maybe an hour. I don’t know, mate, bugger off!” The faun waddled out of the frame, undoubtedly off to visit the picture of the hard-partying centaurs on the third floor (also known as the Party Ponies).   
“Teddy?” questioned Lucy, coming to stand in front of him, in his line of sight.   
“Oh, wotcher,” murmured Teddy. He didn’t move. Lucy’s eyebrows pulled together in concern and she went back to her friends.  
“I don’t know what’s wrong with him,” she whispered. “Maybe he’s having a nervous breakdown?”  
“Maybe it’s a panic attack? Or he’s catching dragon pox? I don’t remember him ever having it when we were little,” suggested James.  
“Maybe we should get Victoire?” said Elaine, softly.   
At the name of his long-time girlfriend, Teddy’s head whipped around. “No!” he all-but shouted before clapping a hand over his mouth. All three young wizards looked startled, staring wide-eyed at their sometime professor. Teddy drew his hand away from his mouth and ran it through his sandy blonde hair, which darkened to a deep blue before their eyes. James’s eyes darted back and forth between Teddy’s hair and the deeply distressed look on his face.  
“Teddy, your hair looks depressed. Let’s go get some lunch and talk about it.”   
Teddy nodded and let Lucy lead him by the arm to the kitchens, instead of the Great Hall. Elaine reached up and tickled the pear in the portrait of the basket of fruit that guarded the entrance. The pear promptly emitted a sound like a giggle and turned into a door handle. Elaine opened the door and the four of them were ushered in by the house elves of the kitchen to a table in the corner. They immediately started bringing over food, for which the wizards showed gratitude. As they ate, the three students talked and Teddy just sat there mechanically moving food from the table to his mouth. James, who considered Teddy a brother, grew antsier and antsier over Teddy’s lack of talking until finally he slammed his palms on the table.   
“Teddy, talk to us, what’s wrong? Are you ok? Is Victoire ok?”   
Teddy sighed and pushed his plate away. “Yeah, we’re all fine. Everyone’s fine. It’s just… Look, Jamie, you’re my family, and I love you like a brother, but this might be a bit out of your depth.”  
“I’m of age Ted!” said James, loudly, throwing his hands up. “I’m just concerned! Talk to me!”  
“James,” Teddy said, taking on a shaper tone. James was unfazed and merely crossed his arm defiantly. “Believe me, I want to tell you, but-”  
“No, tell me.” James felt himself start to devolve into a petulant child, but he didn’t care. Lucy and Elaine, for their part, remained quiet on the other side of the table, watching the back-and-forth like a tennis match.  
“James, I-” Teddy began apologetically.  
“Tell me, or I’m using that fireplace over there to floo Dad.”  
Teddy froze, narrowing his eyes as if to gauge James’s sincerity. “You wouldn’t.”  
“Try me,” dared James.  
After a minute of intense staring down, Teddy relented. His shoulders slumped and he uncrossed his arms.  
“Victoire’s pregnant,” he murmured, with downcast eyes.  
Elaine and Lucy’s faces lit up, and they clapped and started bubbling over with congratulations. James looked perplexed still, though.   
“Why did you try to keep that from me Teddy?” asked James. “Are you ashamed of this?”  
Teddy looked wounded. “No, never, Jamie!”   
“Are you planning on sticking around?”  
“Of course! I would never abandon Tori!”  
“Then why?”  
Teddy ran a hand through his hair as it returned to its normal sandy brown color.  
“I know we’re young. And I know it’s not very traditional to do pregnancy first. And I guess I just didn’t want you to think less of me, and especially not less of your cousin, for letting this happen. We were careful. We were safe, but sometimes things don’t go according to plan.  
“But I love Victoire and I am going to spend the rest of my life with her. Are you still mad, Jamie?”  
James looked him up and down, reading his face for sincerity. Then he smiled, nodded, and drew Teddy in for a hug, slapping his back in a brotherly manner. Teddy smiled too and let out a happy sigh.   
After they released each other, James clapped his shoulder.  
“You’ll be a great father, Ted,” said James, turning back to his lunch. “Besides, I don’t know why you were worried about telling me. Now you have to tell Uncle Bill, Aunt Fleur, Mom, and Dad. Oh, and Grammy Molly.”   
Teddy paled and propped his forehead against his fingertips while the three younger wizards just dissolved into giggles.


	2. Chapter 2

“Elaine! I don’t know what I’m doing!” called out James from his room in the Head Boy and Girl’s dormitory. Elaine sighed and rolled her eyes. She was finishing typing up her most recent post.  
And now the boy in question is calling out for me. No not in the good way/ He’s been needy recently (again, not in the good way), because of the new assignments in class. It’ll be an interesting term, that’s for sure. My first year, and even part of my second, I really didn’t feel like I belonged here. He changed that. And all of my other friends that I have now of course. I was a quiet kid to be honest. I wasn’t born into this world-  
“ELLLLLLLE!!!!” whined James from the next room.  
“Jim! Sweet baby Merlin! I will be there in a second!” Elaine shouted back.  
Well, that’s far too much about me. Remember? I’m the boring one in this relationship. I’m the fly on the wall. And I’m a fly who has homework. More hot gossip coming your way soon! Charms and curses, Cas Novak.   
Elaine sighed, sending a final glance at her pen name (which she had taken from a Muggle American TV show she had happened across a couple of summer breaks ago), before casting her final ‘post’ charm. Her alter ego had happened by chance. She had started writing about her fellow students two years ago when she had come across a spell for an old student-run newspaper. Essentially, you cast the spell on a bunch of pieces of paper, connecting them to a source piece, and the spell caster could write anything they wanted on the original, use the spell to publish, and all the other papers would show what was written.   
“Cas” had been running Hogwarts’s trashiest gossip magazine for two years and soon it would be time to pass the torch, as Elaine was graduating. She was still considering her options (including just uprooting the project entirely), but her preliminary candidates for replacement included James’s younger sister Lily, one of the other Weasley cousins, Rose, or a rather well-connected Ravenclaw named Amanda Lewis (who was best friends with Rose).   
After publishing, Elaine remembered James, who had started groaning unnecessarily from his room and banging his head against his pillow. When Elaine got to him, he was lying face-down, sprawled on his bed. She rolled her eyes and sat down next to him, her back propped up against his headboard and her legs stretched straight in front of her. She reached over James and grabbed his laptop, staring at the screen. Somehow, James had mistyped the Facebook web address, replacing the letters ‘a’ and ‘e’ with two that changed the word ‘face’ into a far more inappropriate one.   
“Uh, James, if you’re lonely-”   
“Shut up, Elle. It was an accident and now the pop-ups won’t go away!” James muttered, his face still stuffed into his pillow.  
Elaine just smiled and typed in the correct address.  
“There,” she said, as James turned over onto his back. She set his laptop on his stomach. “All better. Now you need to make an account.”  
“Ugh, it’s too hard!”  
“No, James, it’s not,” Elaine sighed. She sighed a lot around James. “You just have to type in some things about yourself and create a profile. Anyone with half a brain can do it. Well, you might actually run into problems, then.” James threw a pillow at her head, which she caught easily. She laughed and whacked him with it. He rose up to his knees on the bed during her attack and grabbed her wrists to stop her, only succeeding in pulling her down with him when she shifted her weight. They devolved into giggles and ended up just lying next to each other, laughing hysterically for no apparent reason, like best friends do sometimes.   
James had no idea Elaine was Cas Novak. Shee had taken percautions to write about literally everyone (including herself and her friends) brutatlly, so as not to draw suspicion to herself. There had been an awkward week where she had spread the rumor that she had a crush on James (which was true, but the fact that it was in a gossip magazine and therefore intrinsically false had also saved their friendship because James didn’t believe the rumor). There was also the awkward week where she merely listed off all the people who had kissed in a game of spin-the-bottle at a party in the Room of Requirement (including James and Lucy’s ex-girlfriend, Lucy and Elaine’s ex-boyfriend, and Elaine and Lorcan Scamander), which they had all sworn (not magically) to never tell anyone outside the Room. That had been last spring, and the school almost hadn’t recovered.   
Eventually it was determined that the nark would never be found and Headmistress McGonagall had made a public request at an assembly that “Cas Novak” either go underground or never attempt to cause that kind of emotional trauma to the student body ever again.   
So, Elaine held back, published a note of apology at the end of the year, and didn’t start up again until October of the next term. She was more careful now.   
James’s head swiveled over to his desk, where his own copy of Cas’s writing had started glowing, signaling a new publication. James got up and glanced over the paper, picking it up in his hand.   
“Man, Cas is cranking these out recently. We got two over winter break, right?” Elaine nodded. She didn’t like when people read her writing in front of her, even if they didn’t know it was her writing. It only made those reading overly-critical of her work, particularly when they were reading about themselves.  
James came and sat down next to her, holding it out for them to share. Elaine shook her head.  
“I’ll read it later. Give me the rundown.” James nodded and skimmed.  
“Um, Lucy, Lorcan, Albus, Benji and Merriman all have new girlfriends, who are Beth, Sammy, Kate, Lyla, and Gertie. Rose and Scorpios are rumored to be hooking up in broom closets. Gross. And old Slughorn is finally retiring! And he’s throwing a Slug Club Party next week, which is invitation only, but the Hufflepuff sixth years are printing up fake ones for those third year and up who are not invited. I guess we’ll get our invites in potions tomorrow.”  
Elaine nodded along, pretending like this was all new information. She had gotten good at this, and would actively participate in the social analysis of this news tomorrow. For now, she just played along. James leaned against her as he prattled on and she leaned her head against his shoulder. It was times like these when she wondered about them as a couple. When it was just the two of them and they could talk for hours about anything and nothing. But unless she could be totally honest about who she was, she knew that could never happen.

Professor Thomas wandered around the classroom, watching over his students’ shoulders as they played Farmville and chatted with each other. They explored and researched Facebook today, meaning that next class they would give short presentations and turn in a response paper on their experiences.   
James, Elaine, and Lucy has secluded themselves in the back corner, all three of them hastily typing. They were simultaneously chatting with multiple people and playing Sims lite for Facebook. Lucy also had a few different tabs open at the top of her computer. She was in the corner, her back pressed to the wall, so her computer screen could not be seen because no one could walkbehind her. As Professor Thomas was helping out another group of students with emoticons, the three Gryffindors started whispering hastily to each other.  
“How much longer, Lucy?” asked James.  
“Just a second, Jamie. Some guy started chatting with me on Facebook.”  
“Do you know him?” asked Elaine. “James, quit trying to steal my dog!” James grinned and again tried to lure Elaine’s simulated golden retriever to his house across the street from Elaine’s.   
“No, I don’t recognize his name. Maybe he’s a Muggle from 2014?”  
“Luce, talk to your new boyfriend later,” said James. “Ha ha! Yes!”  
“Dammit!” cried Elaine, whacking her desk with the palm of her hand. Heads swiveled in their direction and they both grimaced in apology. Lucy drew their attention back to her as she finished her side project.  
“Alright,” she whispered. “To launch the network, I need to use the school wi-fi to get it online. I can’t access it directly because the school will see, so I’ve created a masking program that will bounce the network off all the computers and gather enough wi-fi from each to start the network. Once it is live, it will be hidden, unless you have a registered username and network key. The time we log on there will not show up on the records for our usage for this class, so in order to meet the five-hour minimum usage per week, we still need to use Hogwarts wi-fi for official class work.”  
Lucy typed a quick response as a chime from her computer announced the arrival of another new chat message. She switched off the volume on her computer and continued.  
“So, when I start the program, your wi-fi will probably slow down, maybe your computer will glitch for a second, but after that it should be fine.”  
“Glitch?” asked James.   
“Stop and then start again,” responded Lucy, typing again. It has been discovered quite early on that Lucy had a talent for computers, and had been approached by several of their classmates to create a network where they could browse without being monitored. Lucy had agreed, because she ended up loving working with computers, enjoyed the challenge, and was quickly surpassing the professors and the Board in her knowledge of them.   
Elaine and James watched as Lucy typed in a final sequence and, very dramatically, hit the enter button.   
This moment was quickly followed by the next, where in every computer in the room went black for several seconds, powering down at the same time. A successive cry went up from most of the students before power was restored, all the screens flickering back to life. The class immediately started babbling, asking what had happened, growing louder and louder, until Dean shot off a spell from his wand that quieted the room with a loud bang. The class froze under Dean’s commanding stare.  
“Ms. Weasley,” he began. Both Lucy and Molly rose. “Ms. Molly Weasley,” he corrected. Lucy sank back down, exhaling in relief. “Please perform a quick system scan and make sure the computers are all still fully operational.”   
Molly nodded, casting a spell that produced a silky white mist from each computer. The mist gathered and was sucked up by Molly’s wand, which Molly pointed at the nearest sheet of blank paper. The paper was suddenly covered in data, representative of the computers. Molly’s eyes scanned the paper before she reported the all clear to Dean. Dean nodded and turned back to the class.   
“Back to work.” The class immediately started back at Facebook again, while James and Elaine turned directly to Lucy.   
“Did it work?” asked James. Lucy nodded, still typing away at her laptop.   
“It’s online. I’ll send you both links to join, which will generate a user name for you. The link will appear as spam mail, so check you spam folder in your email. Then just join, create a password, and you’re hidden. Done. Tell the rest of the class to talk to me if they want to join.” James and Elaine nodded before continuing with their research for their presentations for the week.   
Lucy returned to her previous Facebook conversation though, opening up her page on the hidden network (which she nicknamed the Incognet).  
So you’re new to Facebook? asked the guy, whose name was Abe Elder.  
Yes, brand new, replied Lucy.  
Well, that’s great! Where are you from? You’re page doesn’t say…  
Oh, I’m from Wales, but I go to boarding school in Scotland.  
That’s awesome! I wish I got to go somewhere cool like that. I live in Canada and go to school here. In Saskatchewan.  
I’ve never been to Canada but I hear its cold there.  
All the time. So what do you do for fun, Lucy?  
“Alright, wrap up your games and conversations everyone! Next class, you will be presenting your findings. You will only have a couple of minutes, so please actually plan what you are going to say, Mr. Weatherby!” The slacker Hufflepuff shrugged and his friends laughed. Lucy logged off of Facebook and closed her laptop, slipping it into her bag.  
As they went to lunch, she couldn’t help but hope that she might have made a new friends who lived halfway across the world.

“I’m not sure how I feel about the Facebook page Cas created,” said James, browsing the page at lunch two days later. They had just finished presenting their findings to their Muggle Studies class and James and Elaine were happily basking in the afterglow of well-presented papers. Lucy sat a couple of rows down, still hopelessly engaged in her Facebook chat with Abe.   
Since the introduction of the computers 4 days ago, parents had been shipping in laptops more and more every day. Now, nearly every student over the age of 15 had a computer in their bag, the common rooms were littered with chargers and laptop sleeves, and meals were considered internet time. Even the professors had started delving into the world-wide web.   
After class two days ago, Cas Novak had started a Facebook page, after being inspired by similar pages at Muggle educational institutions. The page was called Hogwarts Confessions and it was run by Elaine on the Incognet. Students could submit their confessions anonymously via the Facebook message system and Cas would post them to the page. Overnight, the page had gained follows from around the world.   
This was due to the worldwide renown of the Harry Potter book series. In the late 1990s, at the height of Voldemort’s second reign of terror, a relatively-unknown witch had published Harry Potter’s biography in the form of fantastical, “fictional” Muggle books. Or, at least, the Muggles thought it was fantastical and fictional. To the Wizarding World, Harry’s story was simply modern history, and Harry was a celebrity, as well as James’s father.   
Elaine’s maintenance of the page simply boiled down to sorting through which submissions were actually from Hogwarts students and which ones were from Muggle fans. Many were from Muggle fans. Many.  
Elaine stayed up late at night posting and continued checking throughout the say. The confessions had become harsher and harsher, even resulting in un-anonymous comments underneath anonymous submissions. Elaine had already presented her paper on cyberbullying (mostly based on the page) and was considering taking down Hogwarts Confessions entirely. Not five minutes ago, a third person that day had burst into tears over the comments and posts on the page. Elaine kept her head down as the Slytherin fourth year had run past their table to the nearest bathroom. The guilt was starting to weigh on her.  
“No one deserves to have that kind of public humiliation forced upon them, even if they are Sally Sonora,” said James, of the Slytherin crier.   
“James, all they said was that her hair looks flat today,” replied Elaine.  
“And that is an egregious insult!”  
“I just don’t understand why people post such actual mean things on here. Why can’t they just confess their own secrets?”  
James rolled his eyes and straddled the bench, face to Elaine.   
“Because no one ever wants to air their own dirty laundry. They would much rather hear about the downfall of others than see themselves crash and burn. But I’m worried about Lucy. She’s been talking a lot to that Muggle Abe.”  
“Its fine, Jim. She’s not stupid. She won’t be like your mom, I swear.”  
“You say that now, but she already broke up with Beth and she wouldn’t do that unless she had feelings for someone else.”   
“Speak of the devil,” muttered Elaine as Lucy’s now-ex-girlfriend wandered up to Lucy.   
“Hey, Luce, can we talk?” Lucy looked up from her screen and nodded, closing her laptop. She shot Elaine and James a look and they instantly looked anywhere but at the girls.   
“So, did you set up your Twitter account yet?”  
“Shut up, James, I’m trying to eavesdrop!”  
“This is why we’re best friends,” smiled James before cocking his head to the side to try and hear better.  
“You two look ridiculous,” said the Charms professor, sliding into the seat across the table from Elaine and James.  
“Cousin, dearest,” said James, turning to Victoire. “I’m trying to stealthily listen to a private conversation involving other cousin dearest.” He then turned his ear back to Lucy and Beth.  
“We told the parents last night,” said Victoire. James and Elaine swiveled to face Tori and gave her their full attention.  
“Is that why Teddy isn’t here today? Is he dead?” asked James. Tori rolled her eyes.  
“No, he’s finalizing the wedding details. We’re going to Monte Carlo for the weekend and eloping.”   
Elaine slapped a hand over her mouth to contain her squeal and James was smiling from ear-to-ear. His eyes were sparkling as he leaned closer to his cousin.  
“Can I?”  
“Why would I tell you otherwise?” responded Tori. James leaned across the table, kissed his cousin on the cheek and stood up. He stepped on to the bench, brushed the plates of food out of the way, and stepped up onto the table.  
“Hear ye, hear ye citizens of Hogwarts!” James proclaimed to the entire Great Hall. Victoire was blushing scarlet, but smiling hugely. “Please offer your loud and profound congratulations to my cousin, Victoire Brigitte Weasley, and my godbrother, Theodore Muriel Lupin, in their impending marriage, to be held this weekend! And another sincere and blissful uproar, for they are also expecting a child to be born in-” “Late June.” “-the sixth month of the calendar year!”  
The Great Hall burst out with thunderous applause for several moments before James reigned them back in.   
“Please once again offer your loudest praise wence Theodore Muriel Lupin comes into the Great Hall. That is all!”   
James sat back down and the Hall went back to normal, until about ten minutes later when Teddy wandered into the Hall and everyone started chanting “Muriel!”


	3. Chapter 3

“Twitter’s evolution can be mostly characterized by its rapid growth over the decade it was in prominence,” said Professor Thomas, while his students took notes. It was day one of Twitter week and it was the first day they hadn’t had laptops out in class, but were instead taking old-fashioned notes. “It was founded and launched in 2006, but crashed in 2017 after what was later called “Tweetgate”. At the height of its usage, it had two major functions: celebrity social commentary and news breaking. Legitimate news outlets all over the world were using Twitter to publish their up-date-news stories.   
“One of the facets of Twitter is that you cannot use more than 140 characters per Tweet, making the things published short, abbreviated breakdowns of much more major issues. This is directly correlated to Muggle society’s disregard for news or information that is not clipped, short, and straight-to-the-point. Gone were the days of in-depth news coverage. News programs not only didn’t publish full-length articles anymore, but they also used tweets from literally anyone with a Twitter account as legitimate sources. This was a problem because no one was actually getting the full story anymore, but publishers were not held accountable because readers did not seem to care about this development. They wanted the news they wanted when they wanted it and they wanted in two sentence summary format.”  
James was napping in the back of the classroom with his head on Elaine’s shoulder. It was starting to annoy her, though, because his drool was beginning to soak through her robes. Elaine rolled her eyes and shoved her shoulder upwards. James jerked awake and accidentally banged his head on the desk. As he was rubbing his head, Elaine had to stuff her fist in her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. James just cursed and glared at her.  
“Yes, hilarious, Elle. Now I have a concussion,” hissed James before raising his hand. Professor Thomas called on him. “Yeah, Elaine is beating me over the head with her humor and may concussed me. Can she escort me to Madam Pomfrey?”  
Dean rolled his eyes and nodded. “We all heard the crack of your head hitting the table. Miss Ilia, if you would be so kind?” Elaine nodded and pulled James up with her as she started strolling from the room. James stumbled along behind her until she released him when they reached the empty hallway.  
“So what was the deal with the Twitter thing?” asked James, tapping his wand on his palm.  
“Basically, the Muggles wanted their information in shorter and more concise bursts and that all culminated in Tweetgate, which made the site crash, and it never was the same. So, the Muggles adapted, and now they are realizing that in order to actually obtain necessary information, they have to read all of it.”  
“What’s a hashtag?”  
“That I don’t know,” conceded Elaine. She held up her bookbag. “We can look it up while Madam Pomfrey is scolding you for banging your head on a desk with no influence from any other person ever.”  
“She will see right through your lies. Poppy and I go way back.”  
“Poppy?”  
“What? You thought my sister was the only person named after a flower?”  
Elaine smiled and shoved his shoulder, throwing him off balance, but he smiled and rebounded back, running gently into her side. They made it to the Hospital Wing in barely one piece, and quickly proceeded to lounge on the beds. The only other people in the wing were two fourth year Gryffindors, Evan Longbottom and-  
“Lillian Lunesta Potter, what are you doing in the Hospital Wing?” asked James, sauntering up to her bed. Lily rolled her eyes, then coughed violently and groaned.  
“I caught some kind of Muggle virus from that dork,” she replied, her voice hoarse. Evan looked hurt.  
“Oy, just because I had to go visit my cousin in Dublin last weekend doesn’t mean I’m the diseased one!”  
“Yes, it does, Moron! Madam Pomfrey said so!”  
“Well what does she know?!” This sent Evan into his own spiral of coughing.  
“I know enough to infect you with Dragon Pox using only a syringe and a blueberry muffin, Mr. Longbottom. Other Potter. Ilia. What are you doing here?” asked Madam Pomfrey, noticing the two seventh-years standing in her Hospital Wing. They looked at each other, suddenly remembering that they had a purpose for being there.  
“James bashed his thick skull on a desk and is complaining about a concussion.”  
Lily scoffed. “Doubtful. I didn’t think anything could crack his skull.”  
“Hush, now, Miss Potter. Your parents, both of your parents,” Madam Pomfrey said, motioned to the two ill-stricken ones in the beds, “will be here momentarily. Mr. Potter, come with me, I’ll give you a short exam and something for the pain. Miss Ilia, find a spot that isn’t too close to the germ cloud around those two.” Elaine immediately backed away and sat down three beds away. She pulled out her laptop to work on homework while James got his exam. Shortly after James and Madam Pomfrey left, the Potters and the Longbottoms arrived, both couples looking worried and harried.   
“Lily! What is happening? How serious is it?” asked Ginny, sitting down next to her prone daughter. Lily scoffed at her mother’s worry and looked at both her parents.  
“I’m fine, Mum. Just some Muggle bug. No big deal.”  
“No big deal?” asked Harry, arms crossed. “Young lady, Madam Pomfrey called us in the middle of the work day. She doesn’t do that unless it’s an emergency!”  
The Longbottoms were asking similar questions of their son, who was responding in a similar fashion. Madam Pomfrey and James came out then.   
“Don’t worry, parents, don’t worry! It’s a very treatable disease, I just can’t treat it here. St. Mungo’s is perfectly equipped to deal with Mononucleosis, but since it is a Muggle disease, I don’t have the specialized training. In order to check someone into St. Mungo’s I need parent permission, which is why you all are here. I believe I only said I needed one parent?”  
“Well, you wouldn’t tell Neville what was going on and I assumed the worst,” said Hannah Longbottom nee Abbott. She ran The Leaky Cauldron in London, so she had simply apparated to the front gates and her husband, the herbology professor, Neville Longbottom, had let her in. “We both got here as quickly as we could.”  
“The same goes for me,” said Harry. Elaine eyed him over the top of her laptop. She had met him several times, and even spent holidays at Potter Mansion before, but still felt like Harry was a celebrity that she wouldn’t normally have the good fortune of running into. Though Harry had a real job as an auror and tried to only use his celebrity for charity, the Wizarding World still saw him as a minor celebrity, and his life was often making news, which his wife actually worked for. Ginny Weasley-Potter was a very successful ex-professional Quidditch player for the Hollyhead Harpies, and a current sports reporter for the Daily Prophet. “Ginny called in a panic, so we both flooed over to Minerva’s fireplace. Are you sure they are alright?”  
“Yes! Your son is less alright then they are, and even he’ll be fine.” Harry and Ginny both swiveled around to see James standing there. He smiled abashedly. Ginny quickly went over and hugged him, kissing the top of his head before trying to flatten his hair with her hand. James batted her away and smiled at his father. Ginny kept her arms around his shoulders while Madam Pomfrey talked. “He has a minor concussion.”  
“Wait, he’s actually hurt?” asked Elaine, standing up and joining the group.  
“Don’t worry, Dear, he only got a few rocks knocked loose. Nothing I can’t fix. I can’t tell you the number of times his parents and all those other Quidditch hooligans came in here complaining of a headache after being hit on the head by a quaffle or a bludger or what-have-you.” As she spoke, Madam Pomfrey began lightly tapping James’s head with her wand and gave him two potions to drink. “One for the pain, one for the injury.”  
“Oh, Merlin, James! I’m so sorry!” exclaimed Elaine, instinctively reaching for his hand. She stopped herself and went for the shoulder pat instead. He grimaced at her as his dad ruffled his hair.   
“Why are you sorry Elaine?” asked Harry, looking concerned.  
“Well, he was sleeping on my shoulder and I bumped him awake, so he hit his head.”  
“You were sleeping in Dean’s class?” asked Ginny?  
“You know my schedule?” asked James. Ginny blushed.  
“I checked it right before I came over here to see if we all could get some lunch in Hogsmeade with your brother while we were here.”  
James’s eyebrows shot up and he gave her a knowing smile. “Yeah, sure Mum. Whatever you say. So, I’m good to go Madam Pomfrey?”  
“Yes, yes, you’re fine. Now, for the parents, I need you to stick around. I need signatures on these forms.”  
“I’ll meet you guys in an hour at the gates?” said James. His parents nodded and returned to their sick daughter. James and Elaine skedaddled out of there and into the hallway.  
“Geez, what did Lily do to get herself so sick?” asked James. Elaine struggled with her bag and James grabbed it out of her hands to help her out. She glared at his implied misogyny. James glared back. “Oh, you know I would help out if it were Al or Lorcan or Scorpious or anyone who needed it.”  
“Back to Lily,” said Elaine, picking her battles. “Apparently, in the Muggle world, Mononucleosis is some kind of kissing disease.”  
“What, like you can only get it through kissing?”  
“I mean, there are other ways too, but that is how it is most prominently spread.”  
“Well, serves her right. She keeps hopping from boy to boy. Sooner or later she was bound to pick up some kind of virus.”  
Elaine stopped walking. James stopped a few steps later and turned back to face her.  
“James, that’s not fair.”  
“What do you mean? She went from Thomas, to Riley, to Lysander, to Vince, to Quinten, and now Evan. Eventually, there had to be consequences.”  
“Yes, but how come you aren’t saying the same thing about Evan?”  
“I don’t get it.”  
“Well, Evan went from Gwen, to Penny, to Emer, to Dominique, to Bella, to Lisa, to Alex, to Jamie, to Caroline, and now to your own sister. In your system of sexual justice, didn’t he have it coming too?”  
James looked extremely confused now. “Wait, Elaine, I swear, I’m not being sexist.”  
“Really? Tell me to my face that you think your sister getting around is just as bad as your brother getting around.”   
Elaine’s hand were now planted on her hips and her eyes were fiery. James would cower if he hadn’t come to already expect Elaine to comment on his unintentionally sexist notions of life.   
“First of all, Al is older than Lily, so he has more experience with relationships, which is why I am more ok, but still not in any way giddy, with his choices. Secondly, Lily is free to make her own mistakes in relationships, and if that means making them with questionable guys, then she needs to learn a lesson in being pickier.”  
“No, see that’s the problem,” said Elaine. “Your sister shouldn’t need to be punished for making her own choices about her body. Not by her family, not by her friends, and not by society. She is doing what she thinks is best for her, and the stigma that is attached to that choice means that girls who kiss more than one guy per term are labelled as ‘easy’ and girls who don’t are ‘smart’. Girls should not be disenfranchised because they decided to make out with a Slytherin in a broom closet.”  
Elaine’s face was red and she was out of breath by the time she finished. James watched her for a second before stepping closer and looking her straight in the eyes.  
“I see your point and in the future I will try to be better about labelling my little sister based on her romantic choices. I’m sorry for offending the female population.”  
“See, that comment! That’s what’s wrong! Why does society think that it is just females who are offended by these thoughts?!”  
“Uh, as a member of the male population, I can firmly say I am not offended by these societal ideals. Don’t they work in my favor usually?”  
“Yes and no. I mean, standards like sexual labels, and female dress codes do give men a free pass, but for the wrong reasons. See, women are told to cover up because men supposedly get distracted, right? But men aren’t told to cover up for the same reason. So what this implies is that women can control themselves, but men are not in control of their own behaviors. This perpetuates the idea that it is ok to assault a woman because she was asking for it because she was wearing the short skirt, when in reality, the blame should fall on the man who was psychologically damaged by society enough to believe that he is entitled to a woman even when she says no. Do you get it?”  
“So, I should be offended because society assumes that I will assault a woman walking down the corridor because her top is too low cut and that makes her the problem?”  
“Yes! Exactly!”  
James thought about this for a second.  
“I actually never thought about it like that. Wow. You do know that you can wear whatever you want and do whatever you want around me and I won’t judge you right?”  
Elaine smiled and fell into step with James again.  
“I do. And thank you for that.”  
“When did you get so smart about all of this?”  
“I spent a lot of time on Twitter last night trying to figure out hashtags. In the Spring of 2014, this new hashtag cropped up suddenly called YesAllWomen with stories about rape culture being propagated through societal norms and I read up on it. It was really helpful in understanding what was happening at that time in terms of feminism.”  
“Cool, I’ll look it up later. Should we go back to class?”  
“Nah, I’ll just tell Professor Thomas that Madam Pomfrey told you to take a nap.”  
“So what are we going to do instead?”  
“Well, you are going to sit in one of the big fluffy chairs in the common room while I whoop your arse at Wizard’s chess.”  
James laughed and allowed himself to be towed all the way back to Gryffindor Tower.


	4. Chapter 4

“So, Muggle videos are like our pictures, because regular Muggle pictures don’t move, but our pictures do?” asked James. They had broken up into study groups for the day, Gryffindors and Slytherins, and Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. The Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs had taken the library, so James, Elaine, Lucy, and Marvin, the quietest Gryffindor, were stuck in the stuffy classroom with Archie Adams, Leonard Ruffgate, Gregor Johnson, and Abigail Abbington of Slytherin house. Abigail was nice enough, but the three boys were nothing but trouble. And as it was the hottest day of the year so far, the humidity in the classroom was rising with every minute.  
“Um, yes,” said Abigail, clicking through a couple of informational links on a reference website called ‘Wikipedia’. “You take a video with a special camera and then can edit it. You can ‘film’ anything and turn it into a video. Muggles watch and make videos all the time, apparently.”  
“Yeah, like TV programs, and movies, and internet videos on the YouTube,” said Leonard.  
“I think it’s just YouTube, Nard,” said Gregor, clapping his friend on the back.  
“He’s right,” said Elaine. “YouTube is the most popular video uploading site on the internet. Anyone can upload anything they want, though there are some content rules.”  
“I’m guessing, no porn, no murder, and no drugs?” said James. The other boys snickered.  
“Gold star for James,” replied Lucy sarcastically. She was currently occupied performing maintenance on the Incognet. It had gone down for a couple of hours early that morning and she suspected that the technology team for Hogwarts was starting to crack it. Another window on her screen started blinking as she typed in a series of code, signaling another message from Abe.  
Can you believe we’ve only known each other three weeks?  
Lucy smiled to her screen as the rest of her study group discussed the difference between a gif and a video. She had asked Abe about all of this last night, and, as a Muggle who believed she was simply internet-incompetent, he had informed of everything she needed to know. You know, in between compliments.  
I didn’t think it was possible to get to know someone so well in such a short period of time.  
I know what you mean. It’s like we were meant to find each other, you know?  
Lucy was blushing, and didn’t notice the looks the other members of her study group were shooting her. Lucy Weasley was known for having all the answers and never being able to contain herself. It was simply uncharacteristic of her to just be sitting there, not saying anything, occasionally releasing a quiet chuckle or a sigh. It was like she didn’t even want to learn.  
“So, maybe we should watch some of these videos?” asked Elaine, pulling up YouTube on her computer screen. She went up to the front of the classroom, where the tech team had recently installed a ‘projector,’ which, when connected to a computer, used a series of lights and mirrors to relay the image on the screen through a lens, onto a much larger screen at the front of the classroom for the whole class to see. Elaine was a fan of this new system and quickly attached her laptop. “What do you guys want to see?”  
“Apparently cats are popular,” replied Abigail.  
“And people falling down in various ways,” said James.  
“So are TV show bloopers? What are bloopers?” asked Gregor. Elaine shrugged and typed in ‘bloopers’ to the search box. The box automatically started suggesting popular searches. Elaine picked ‘bloopers sports’ to look up and clicked on a Muggle football (or soccer, to you Americans) video. Immediately, the teen wizards were greeted with a man getting hit in the head with a hard-kicked ball. After wincing, they all started giggling, except Lucy, who was still engrossed with Abe. The other wizards were all on the floor laughing after about ten minutes of watching various players miss the ball in hilarious ways or get in a variety of painful places on the body. As soon as the video was over, they all started suggesting other videos to watch, as they had all been looking at YouTube as well. Elaine decided upon a series of bloopers from an American TV program titled ‘Supernatural’.  
The set was dark, the characters, who appeared to be related, were in dark clothes and interacting with a motley crew of other darkly-clothed characters. They would attempt to be serious in a scene and usually the individual blooper ended with someone cracking up.   
“Do they broadcast these on Muggle TV?” asked Archie. After a quick session of googling, the unanimous answer was no.   
“It looks like bloopers are mess ups of the scenes they are trying to film. So they save the mess up and put the best ones on a ‘blooper reel’ for later. Then they get shown on individual copies of the TV show or movie as ‘special features’ that come only with that TV show or movie copy. Fans upload them to sites like YouTube for everyone to enjoy,” was Abigail’s long-winded answer. James whistled.   
“Wow, you got through a whole soliloquy without Lucy interrupting you once. I wonder if she had a stroke.” They all turned to look at Lucy, who was still engrossed in her computer. Elaine sighed.   
“Moving on. I want to know more about this show. Were they casting spells? I didn’t recognize what they were saying, but it sounded like an incantation.”  
“You think they were doing magic on Muggle TV?” asked Gregor.  
“It’s possible,” said Elaine. “Maybe they stumbled upon a spell book and thought it was fake.”  
“Well, we could watch the show, just to see what it’s about?”  
An hour later, after creating a Netflix account, the eight wizards found themselves staring at the screen, open-mouthed.  
“But, what happens now? Do they find their dad?” asked Gregor.  
“And the mother? What happened to her?” asked Leonard.  
“Do they just hunt demons forever?” asked James.  
“Guys, there is a rational way to solve this,” said Elaine. “We need to watch all of the episodes.” As everyone nodded in agreement, Elaine hit the infamous ‘Next Episode’ button that has been the downfall of nations.  
And that is how Lucy found James and Elaine 4 days later, huddled under blankets, empty wrappers and dirty dishes littered around them. The sounds of sobbing filling the air as James was curled up in a ball on his side. Lucy could hear faint shouts of “Sam?! SAM!!” coming from the laptop that sat in front of them. They both had rings under their eyes and looked like they hadn’t even blinked in at least two days. Lucy heard the now-familiar sound of the Supernatural credits start to roll and quickly darted forward to slam the laptop closed.  
Both wizards loudly protested, but Lucy shook her head.  
“Nope. No. No way. You two have been sitting here long enough. When was the last time you even showered? Or ate a full meal?” The pair looked at each other, then back to Lucy. She tucked the laptop under her arm and put her hands on her hips. “Go shower. Go put on clean clothes. Class starts in an hour. I hope you two have your weekly reflection papers prepared.” James shuffled off, wiping the tears from his cheeks. Elaine picked up their completed papers from the coffee table the laptop had been sitting on.  
“We learned to multitask,” said Elaine, proudly. She didn’t realize she had chocolate smeared on her cheek and a stray Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Bean in her hair. Lucy reached over and plucked the candy out. Elaine grimaced. “Yeah, I’ll go shower. Can you have the house elves send something up for us?” Lucy nodded sympathetically.   
How could she let it get this far? Granted, she had been sucked into the world that was Abe recently. Her own online activity was beginning to get out of control. She had been shaken from this by a suggestion of Abe’s from the previous night. Lucy thought about the message again as she rung down to the kitchens.  
Should we meet?  
Lucy hadn’t even bothered responding yet, so she was probably freaking Abe out a little bit. He shouldn’t have sprung that on her though. They hadn’t even known each other for four weeks yet! She had taken more time than that just to choose a new book to read last term!  
She hoped Abe knew that. She hoped he knew that she wasn’t being rude, just thinking a lot about an important decision. Somehow, in the last couple of weeks, Abe had become a person she considered important in her life. He had listened to her, and been there for her when she needed support. She could see how online relationships could lead to something more (like she had read about so many times since first talking to Abe), but she just couldn’t wrap her head around starting a relationship like that herself.


	5. Chapter 5

Lucy pondered all of this until she heard the house elves knocking at the door. James walked down the stairs in just a towel then. Lucy scowled at him and his very-much-in-shape body.   
“Merlin, James, it’s just me and Elaine here. In order for you to use your body to attract women, there have to be interested women present. Put a shirt on.”  
“I’m just providing something nice to look at as an alternative to your face,” replied James, answering the door and letting in a house elf with a rolling cart of food. “Hey Timber. Thanks for bringing us something. Elaine and I lost track of time and were going to miss breakfast.”  
“It’s no problem, Mister James. I know you and Missus Elaine like to spend all kinds of time together, as the boyfriends and girlfriends do.”  
“Whoa, Timber, Elaine and I aren’t dating!”  
Timber smiled knowingly. “As you say, Sir. Here, I brought Missus Elaine some strawberries. Professor Longbottom grew them himself in one of the greenhouses, Sir, and I know how much she likes them.”   
“That was very kind of you, Timber,” said Lucy, reaching for a plate at the same time as Timber tried to hand her one. The plate slipped, knocking over several more in the process, and Lucy cried out.  
“It’s going down!”  
James yelled out, “Timber!”  
Timber immediately snapped his fingers and the trays and plates froze mid-air. Timber started walking around and righting them before snapping his fingers and returning the cart to normal. James let out a relieved sigh.  
“Thanks, buddy. And thank you for the food, especially the strawberries. I know Elaine will appreciate them.”  
Timber bowed and finished setting the plates on the coffee table before exiting with the rolling cart. James stretched and cracked his back and neck as Lucy started digging in. Elaine walked out in fresh robes just as James brought himself up to his full height. She stopped for a second and stared, taking in the sight of her handsome best friend. They made eye contact and held it for a few seconds. James, who was oblivious, broke the tension-laced staring contest, sat down and started eating, the only sign of his noticing Elaine being a slight blush on his cheeks. Lucy, who caught all of that non-verbal exchange, snorted into her orange juice, trying not to laugh. Elaine and James looked at her.  
“What?” asked Elaine. “Something to share?”  
Lucy smiled endearingly at her friends. “You two are adorable is all. Hey, have you guys heard anything about Cas recently? It’s been quiet since last Wednesday.”  
Elaine sat down just a bit too close to James and started wolfing down her toast and berries. “I don’t think it’s that weird. Maybe they’re just busy.”  
“I mean, I guess. It is practically midterms. But, Cas is pretty good about publishing on time.”  
“Maybe they’ve run out of gossip?” suggested James.  
“In Hogwarts? That’s highly unlikely. Besides, Rose and Scorpius finally got together and are unofficially the school’s official power couple. The Weasley and Malfoy families united by love.”  
“Rose and Scorpius?!” said James, his voice rising as octave. Elaine raised her eyebrows at him, but continued eating. Lucy did the same. James looked back and forth between the two of them. “Am I the only one who’s concerned here?!”  
“Yes, for two reasons,” said Lucy. “One, everyone else is already over it and two, you enjoy over-reacting. You know Scorpius is the most-decent human being to come out of the Malfoy family in quite a few generations, and Rose is level-headed young woman now, who can think for herself. Let it be, James. Don’t make a fuss.”  
“You make me sound like a toddler,” he pouted, pushing out his bottom lip before standing and going to his room to get dressed.  
“You make yourself sound like a toddler,” replied Lucy as he closed the door. She smiled and returned to her food.  
“Why are we adorable?” asked Elaine, out of the blue.   
“Sorry?”   
“You said we were adorable earlier. Why?”  
“Really, Elle? You don’t see it?”   
Elaine shook her head, picking out another strawberry from the bowl. Lucy sighed.  
“Look, Elle, I’m not going to spell it out for you. You two have been dancing around each other for years now. Eventually one of you, or both of you, are going to snap and you’ll have to deal with consequences, but until then…”  
“Snap about what?”  
Lucy decided to lay some hard truths on her.  
“About the feelings you two have for each other.”  
Elaine blushed the deepest shade of scarlet and hid her face, but Lucy could tell she was smiling.  
“Wow, I’ve never seen that shade of red on a face that didn’t have a matching shade of red for the hair.”  
“You think-”  
“Alright ladies!” interrupted James, throwing his door open. “It is time for class. Elle, grab our papers?”  
“Sure.”  
“Let’s go!”  
Lucy started to follow James out the door, but Elaine grabbed her elbow and pulled her back a step.  
“To be continued.”  
Lucy made it through the rest of the day without thinking about Abe and his question too much. She let herself be distracted by homework and class and her friends. She even was so distracted she forgot about her conversation with Elaine until after dinner. In celebration of Friday every Friday, James and Elaine had game night in the Head Girl and Boy’s room. They had decided that this Friday they would show a movie instead and asked the tech team to install a projector in their common room that morning. Lucy got there right after dinner to help them set up.  
Elaine pulled Lucy into her room as soon as Lucy got there and started rambling.  
“Alright, so you know how I feel about James because of that one night with the Firewhiskey and the truth or dare and the skinny dipping, but that was the first time I ever admitted to myself that I even had feelings for James, and I didn’t even full realize before that night. I’ve never even really put any faith in those feelings because I admitted them when I was under the influence and, as a general rule, I never trust what happens when I am inebriated. So, now I’m finally ready to maybe start pursuing a relationship with James, but I’m scared and nervous and I can’t talk to you about it because that would break the code of conduct between family members and you would have to take James’s side if we ever broke up because he’s your family and I wouldn’t have any friends after that because I’m really pretty much only friends with people who are related to you and James and I’m not complaining about that because I love you guys so much, but this is what I have been thinking about every day since last summer and I just had to tell someone because all I can think is that if James and I do end up together, you and I would be actually related and I already love you like a sister and I don’t want anything to come between that relationship either-”  
“ELAINE!” exclaimed Lucy, putting her hands on the other girl’s shoulders. “Deep breaths.” Elaine sucked in a couple of deep breaths and her face started to return to its normal color. Lucy smiled and nodded and then wrapped her in a hug.  
“Never ever be afraid to talk to me about stuff like this. Just because I’m James’s cousin and your best friend doesn’t mean I am only exclusively one or the other at all times. I want to talk to you about things like this and I want you to be able to come to me as well. We’ve never had problems before talking about boys, so why should that start now just because I’m related to the boy who is perfect for you?”  
Elaine smiled and released her friend, straightening her clothes.   
“We should head out there before James tries to touch anything electronic.”  
“Yeah, that boy should not be in custody of a laptop,” said Lucy. Elaine looked uneasy again and Lucy stopped her from leaving.  
“Hey,” she said, making her friend look her in the eyes. “He does have feelings for you. Even if he doesn’t know it yet. He will. Give him time. Be yourself. Flirt a little. Brush him as you go past. The more physical contact the better. Make him come to his senses and realize that you are the girl he actually wants. Not freaking Abigail Abbington.”  
“What about Abigail?” Elaine asked cautiously.  
Lucy hesitated. “Um, James and Abigail were found messing around in a broom closet last week, but it fizzled out as quickly as it started. It’s literally nothing to worry about. So don’t, ok? I know how you like to let stuff fester.” Elaine nodded and bit her lip.   
“Ok, just… keep me posted? I don’t want to become stalker obsessive, but I do like James. I want to be with him.”  
Lucy smiled at hearing those words. She wanted them to be together too.  
“Ok. Let’s go, alright?”  
Elaine smiled back and followed Lucy downstairs where the Weasley-Potter clan was beginning to gather. James was talking with his brother, Albus, and his cousins, Fred and Roxy. Louis and Dominique were just beginning to come in, followed by Teddy, Victoire, and Molly, the last of whom went and hugged her little sister Lucy. Hugo, Rose, and Scorpius were chatting with Lily and Evan, who had just gotten discharged from St. Mungo’s earlier that week. Other non-family members scattered about the room were the Scamander boys, Lorcan and Lysander, the Woods, twins Wesley and Wendy, and younger brother Will, and the Finnigans, Quinn and Piper.   
James saw that everyone was there and clapped his hands to get their attention.  
“Alright everyone, tonight, we will forego our traditional games night in favor of a Muggle pastime that I thought we might adopt. Muggles was these elongated pictures with sound and a storyline called ‘movies’. The Heads’ Room will be playing one of these such movies this evening, and, if all goes well, we might just do this again sometime. Apparently, the Muggles enjoy popcorn, sweets, and fizzy drink during these films, so the kitchens have graciously provided us with such treats. Elaine has chosen the movie we will be watching this evening, so if she will so kindly hit ‘play’?”  
Elaine did as she was asked and pressed play, suppressing a smirk of mischievousness. The chords of what would be a familiar song to Muggle ears strike up from the cued movie and James sees the look on Elaine’s face as he finds a spot for himself pressed up against her. Everyone else is watching the movie from their spots around the room, engrossed with the opening pictures.  
“What did you do?” whispered James in Elaine’s ear. She giggled and turned to him.  
“You’ll see.”  
Across the screen, in gold letters, and met with simultaneous groans and cheers from the audience, were the words “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” and James hid his face in Elaine’s hair to stop the room from seeing his embarrassed grin.


	6. Chapter 6

“What are tags? What do they do exactly?” asked James, squinting at his screen. He dropped some crumbs from his biscuit on his keyboard and brushed them off with his fingers. Elaine’s eyes tracked his movement and followed his fingers back to his face, where he wiped some more crumbs off his mouth. Elaine smiled and reached across the table.  
“You have some jam on your mouth.”  
James leaned forward slightly and allowed her to use her thumb to get it off. Lucy watched them and scoffed. They both cast her some side-eye, looking at her questioningly.  
“Oh, please,” she said. “Like we can’t tell.” Elaine and James both stared at her incredulously for a second, but she didn’t say anything more, so they returned to the issue at hand. They didn’t take it too personally. Lucy was still chaffing from the radio silence from Abe, who, after Lucy had said they shouldn’t meet right not, had stopped messaging her. She had been super-cynical as of late, particularly in terms of romance. Elaine and James were adapting as best they could, but Lucy was getting snippier and angrier as the week progressed. Their only choice was to not engage.  
“Tags are like categories or characteristics of a post,” said Elaine. “From what I understand, you can click on a tag and see all the posts that are tagged with the same thing. You can also search for certain tags. Have you figured out what ‘fanart’ is yet?”  
“Come here, I just searched for it.”  
Elaine walked over to the other side of the table and they saw pictures of what seemed to be characters, hand-drawn or created by Tumblr users.   
“I don’t know any of these people? Is it made by fans?” asked Elaine.  
James shrugged. “Maybe we should search for something we know in the Muggle world?”  
“What about your dad? He’s popular. Search for ‘Harry Potter fanart’.”   
James did as he was told, typing into the search engine. Both students stared at the results.  
“People drew these?”  
“Wow, they’re talented.”  
“Why would so many people want to draw pictures of my parents?”  
“Or any of your relatives for that matter.”  
“Whoa, is that Aunt Luna kissing my dad?!”  
“Wait, is that your family in reverse genders?!”  
“Is that… Is that my dad and… Mr. Malfoy?!”  
“Why are you talking about my dad, James?” asked Scorpius, walking up behind the pair. Rose was following close behind him, fingers interlaced with his. James saw them and slammed the laptop closed, accidentally catching his fingertips in the process. He barely noticeably winced, but held it in, pretending like nothing was wrong. Scorpius and Rose weren’t buying it, but they decided to play along.  
“Um, nothing. Nothing. Just – nothing,” James stuttered out. The laptop had, surprisingly, hurt quite a lot and he was currently hold back some rather emasculating tears. Elaine was trying not to laugh at the whole situation.   
“Okay,” said Rose, slowly. “Hey, we’re all going to Hogsmeade this weekend and you guys should come.”  
“That sounds like fun!” said Elaine. She loved Hogsmeade, particularly in the warmer months, which, now that they were halfway through the term, they were now getting into. She already knew that she would have a lot of homework, but she could power through that. Getting the hang of Tumblr would be a completely different beast.   
“Ugh, did you guys see what Cas wrote about us this week?” Rose and Scorpius sat down backwards on the benches across the aisle from James and Elaine. The latter pair also turned around to talk to them, as James had gotten over his computer injury.   
“Yeah, I didn’t even know this school had a hidden owlry in the Transfiguration tower,” said James. “How did you two find it?”  
“James,” began Scorpius, “there isn’t a hidden owlry off the Transfiguration tower, we didn’t vandalize it in a fit of passion, and we weren’t caught by two unnamed professors who were hoping to use the room to hook up.”  
“Oh,” replied James. “Why does Cas feel the need to make up so much stuff?”  
“But then she’s spot on about other things, like who is actually in a relationship.”  
“Or that time with the Shrieking Shack?”  
“Or the trimming of the Whomping Willow?”  
“Or remember that time Cas predicted Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans bankruptcy and subsequent buy-out in the same day?”  
“Have you guys ever really wondered about who she is?” asked Elaine.  
“You think Cas is a girl?” asked Scorpius. Elaine nodded. Rose shook her head.  
“I think Cas is a boy.”  
“Like Castiel?” asked James. Scorpius and Rose raised their eyebrows. “Like from Supernatural? Castiel the Angel?”  
“That’s a boy’s name?” asked Rose, glancing at Elaine. Elaine nodded.  
“Hey, we didn’t pick it.”  
“What’s Supernatural?” asked Scorpius.   
“It’s a Muggle TV program in America. Or, it was. It stopped a few years ago after playing for over a decade.”  
“We found this website called Netflix during midterms,” chimed in James. “And watched a lot of TV. Elaine had already seen some of the show on her summer holidays, but we watched all of it together.”  
“With Lucy?” asked Rose, a knowing look in her eyes. James looked confused.  
“No, just the two of us. Lucy was still too busy with ‘Abe’.”  
On that note, the four wizards turned to where Lucy sat, absentmindedly chewing on a carrot stick.  
“Do you think Cas will write about them?” asked Rose. She was worried about her cousin.  
“Probably,” said James. Elaine felt her cheeks get hot. “Cas writes about everything whether we want her to or not.”  
“I just don’t want Cas to blow the story out of proportion. Lucy’s in a delicate state right now and if one thing goes wrong… Guys,” said Rose, bringing her head in closer to the center of the group. The other three did as well. “Lucy only got an acceptable on two of her midterms. Two. She’s never gotten below an Exceeds Expectations, and that was only on the Defense Against the Dark Arts midterm that happened at the same time she was questioning her sexuality.”  
“She almost exclusively gets Outstandings,” whispered James in shock. Elaine was suddenly terrified. Not only had Lucy gotten a normal score on a test, but she hadn’t told Elaine about it. Why was Lucy pulling away? They had just had a conversation about this very topic a couple of weeks ago. The four of them sat in stunned silence until they saw Gregor Johnson walk by them in a hurry.  
“Greg, get your arse back here!” yelled out Archie Adams, while Leonard Ruffgate sat in a typical stupor next to him. Gregor ignored Archie and marched up to Lucy, who looked up dazedly at him. Elaine, James, Scorpius, and Rose watched what happened next.  
“Lucy, I’m sorry for what I’m about to say and I want you to know that I regret everything that happened. At this point, I care too much about you to let these lies go on anymore.” Gregor paused to gather himself.  
“It’s me. I’m Abe Elder. I made up a fake Facebook profile because I thought it would be funny to prank you, but it went too far. At some point along the line, I started caring about you and sharing things with you that I have never shared with anyone else. I could be more open with you then I could with my best friends or my brothers. And I loved it.  
“I-I think I might be in love with you, Lucy. And I know that I lied to you in the biggest way possible and I don’t expect you to forgive anytime soon. But if there is anything that I can do to even begin to make it up to you, if there is any part of you that feels the same way about me, then I want you to know that I am willing to try for as long as you’ll let me to make it work.”  
Gregor stopped, having come to the end of his speech. The whole Hall had stopped talking and was watching the pair, their every movement, their every breath. Lucy rose, standing up to her full height, her shoulders thrown back.  
And she threw a punch that hit him square in the eye and knocked him backward several feet. Elaine, James, Archie, Leonard and the rest of the Great Hall were on their feet at once, voices cheering and leering at the same time. As the Elaine tried to reach them, Lucy started yelling.  
“You think you love me?! You think I will forgive you?! You’ve officially hurt me more than any other thing on the face of this planet. I never want to see you ever again and if you even think about trying to talk to me I’ll give you the second one in that matching set of shiners!!”   
At this point, Al, James and Fred had reached Lucy and were towing her out of the hall, while Archie and Leonard tended to Gregor, who was now sprawled on the floor after an unknown Weasley cousin had landed a hard right hook to his gut as they passed him by. Even Dominique and Louis, the youngest Weasleys, followed everyone outside to the hallway. By the time Elaine got out there, Lucy was shoving her cousins off of her.  
“Let me go! Let me go!!” Lucy shouted, pushing everyone away until they were all out of arm’s reach. Elaine pushed forward until she was in the inner ring and kept going. She stepped forward and reached out until she touched one of Lucy’s hands.  
“Let me go!” Lucy choked out, her words quickly dissolving into sobs. “Let me go.”   
Elaine pulled her in, wrapping her tightly up in her arms. Lucy let herself be held and the Weasley-Potters one-by-one faded back into the Hall, until only James and Molly were left. After a few minutes, Elaine passed Lucy over to Molly, who took her sister to her private residence in the castle, where she could safely cry in peace. James and Elaine watched her until she was gone. And then Elaine promptly turned on her heel, and marched back into the Great Hall, straight up to Gregor and his friends.   
They saw her coming and all started to back away, except for Gregor. He met her head-on and would’ve been hit again if it hadn’t been for James stopping Elaine. He wrapped his arms around her and picked her up off the ground, her limbs flailing as she tried to get away.  
“Let me hit him! He hurt Lucy!!”  
“Elaine! Elle! This won’t solve anything! It only makes him look more pitiable and will make him look like a martyr! It will help him in the long run if you bloody his nose!”  
“I don’t care! He hurt her!” James started carrying her from the Hall like an angry child, her kicking and screaming the whole way. He put her down in the hallway, but kept a firm grip on her wrist until they reached the Head’s Room. Once there, she heaved him off her wrist and started pacing back and forth.  
“I mean, seriously! How could they do this to her?! A joke?! A joke! In what universe is that funny?! I can’t even believe he goes to our school! I can’t even believe he is even human!!”   
“I know, I know, Elaine, I agree with you, but you are going to have a panic attack if you don’t calm down right now.”  
Elaine didn’t stop. She didn’t feel like she could.   
“I just- Why would anyone do that to someone?! Lucy cared about Abe. She told me herself that she thought they could have an actual relationship because she had connected with him so well. And it was Gregor this whole time?! Why did it have to be someone we knew?! How could this happen?”   
James could tell she was getting more and more worked up. She was not going to stop anytime soon. He needed to calm her down, and then they could deal with Lucy. He walked over and gathered up Elaine in his arms. She froze. He pressed her against him and wrapped her up tightly. She shuddered against him and then melted, her head pressed against his shoulder, her arms around his back. He held her close to him and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. He could feel her tears starting to soak through his shirt, but her sobs were silent and restrained.   
“Elle, it’s going to be ok. Everything is going to be ok.”  
And for a whole minute, Elaine believed him.


	7. Chapter 7

The next couple of weeks passed by without event. Lucy sank further and further into a catatonic depression state, only talking and eating enough to get by. Elaine and James were powerless, watching her struggle. Elaine, through her sources as Cas, had discovered that Gregor wasn’t even the creator of the idea and the profile. It was in fact Archie and Leonard, but they knew that Gregor had a way with words, and even already know Lucy decently, so they asked him to play the part of Abe. They also knew that Gregor had a crush on Lucy and it was their own twisted way of trying to play matchmaker. Leave it to a Slytherin to try and create love through lies.   
James and Elaine helped out as best they could. Lucy didn’t go to very many classes, because many of the classes also had their Slytherin counterparts in them, which meant Gregor would also be there. They took excellent notes for her and brought her assignments and extra readings to do. Professor Thomas was the most sympathetic, though after a week of her missing class, even he had his limits. It was nearing the end of the school year and with it brought final projects and NEWTs.   
“Alright class. In two weeks, your final projects will be due. The week after that, you will take your NEWTs. After you have taken your NEWTs, we will take the last week of class to present your findings about the internet. Not only will you be presenting to me and your fellow classmates, but also to the Board of Governors, who will be joining us for all 3 days of presentations. You all have chosen your topics and should be ready to start compiling your findings on internet usage and its benefit to Wizarding culture.   
“I’m going to give you the rest of today to, as well as the next two Mondays to use as in-class research and work time. The other four days of class, we will be reviewing for your NEWTs, so please be here. Alright, that’s all I have to say. If you need me, I’m free to answer all questions you might have. Otherwise, it is a free study period, so go back to your dorms or to the library, or you can stay here.”  
The class dispersed, only a few Ravenclaws remaining to actually study. Everyone else took off, heading in opposite directions. Professor Thomas stopped James and Elaine on their way out the door.  
“I know Miss Weasley has been feeling bad lately, and I know that this class is partially to do with that. I feel very badly about that fact. But she needs to be here, in class, and participating if she wants to pass. Particularly to turn in and present her final project. She’s an excellent student, but that can only get her so far if she refuses to come to class. So, please, relay that message to her.”  
“Sure thing, Professor Thomas,” said Elaine.  
“Also, tell her one more thing. Boys are stupid and she shouldn’t let one of us be a reason to put her education in jeopardy.”  
Elaine smiled and James looked insulted, but they both headed out, intent on going to the Room of Requirement. James had (quite stupidly) thrown a prank water bottle into the Room of Requirement last week to hide it from Professor Longbottom. It made the liquid in the bottle into the drinker’s least favorite drink. Neville had found out about it and wanted to confiscate it (mostly to try and prank Dean with it next time he saw him). James didn’t put the bottle anywhere specific, though, and now had to scrounge through the debris in the Room to try and find it. It had been a test prank from his Uncle George and the only prototype, so George wanted it back now.  
James had begged for Elaine’s help and she had relented, if only because she liked to see what had found its way into the Room this week. It was a treasure hunt every time she went in there, but she never had any idea what the treasure would be. They already had their projects all planned out and were in fact ahead of most of their classmates, a first for James (though an anomaly for Elaine too).   
Archie, Leonard, and Gregor all raced past the pair, eager to get outside into the warm sunshine that coated the grounds that Friday. Since it was the last Hogsmeade weekend of the term, too, everyone was eager to get to Honeydukes and Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes (which had replaced Zonko’s about a decade ago). James glared at the Slytherins, but Elaine only stared. She was starting to understand where they were coming from now, particularly Gregor. She felt hypocritical for speaking ill of them when she was doing essentially the same thing to the entire school. She was wondering whether or not to publish the story about Lucy and them in Cas’s next issue as they walked and James seemed to read her mind.  
“Do you think Cas will write about Lucy and them?”  
“Probably,” replied Elaine, feeling her cheeks grow hot. “Cas writes about everyone, whether we want her to or not.”  
“How was Lucy doing this morning?” asked James. He hadn’t even seen his cousin in a week because boys weren’t allowed in the girls’ dorms, where Lucy had holed herself up.  
“When I left her this morning, she still refused to leave the room and was watching YouTube videos of Muggle military personnel returning home to their families while sobbing over a bowl of popcorn.”  
“She’ll get better,” said James, assuredly. “She has to. She’s Lucy. It’s not like her to let something like this get her down.”  
“I don’t think she’s ever opened up like that to someone she’s known for such a short time before. And then they go and hurt her? That’s not something you can just brush off.”  
“Is it bad that I kind of hope Cas writes about it? If only to expose those arses for who they truly are?”  
“Are you sure you want Lucy’s story laid out like that?”  
“Well, no, and I’m so tired of Cas being used to do important things like this. Cas is not an authority figure and its not their responsibility to reprimand anyone in this school. I mean, what gives her the right to say what is and isn’t right, right?”  
“So you think that if Cas is going to talk smack about people, she might as well do it with good intentions?” asked Elaine, slightly stunned by James’s dramatic outbreak. James nodded decidedly.  
“I think it might hurt Lucy more in the short-term, but will be healing for her in the long-term. I just don’t know if I trust or respect Cas enough to think that they would be completely honest or wouldn’t go too far.”  
Elaine and James walked along quietly for a while. Elaine was silently stewing inside, feeling hurt because of James’s words, but trying not to let it show. She decided that she would publish Lucy’s story in her next issue coming out the following week and tried not to let herself think that, were she to come out as Cas, James would probably lose all respect for her.   
Well, we’ve only got a couple of weeks left of school, gang. And I’m planning on putting out two more issues before term is over. For now, that’s all I have, but I have a feeling that the weeks leading up to graduation will be very eventful.  
Charms and Curses, Elaine Ilia  
Elaine signed off and quickly hit publish. With all of her homework, including the beginnings of her final project in Muggle Studies, and the emotional breakdown of Lucy after ‘Abe’ had revealed himself to be Archie, Leonard, and Gregor, all fellow Muggle Studies classmates as well as Slytherins, her week had been full.   
There were three weeks until graduation and the teachers were packing it in. Slughorn expected 5 potions to be made outside of class by the end of the week. Victoire, now beginning to show, had passed out a list of charms they needed to master for their N.E.W.T.s (Nearly exhausting Wizarding Test) in two weeks. Even Teddy had assigned them all extra practice hours in their choice of either Dueling Club or the Sorcerer’s Stone Challenge Course under the school.   
Elaine hadn’t even spell-checked her publication before sending it off. She flopped back into the giant armchair in her room, closing her eyes. She knew James and Lucy would point out any flaws after they read it, and it was too late to do anything now. She relaxed for what felt like the first time all week until she heard James’s voice boom through their shared space.  
“WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!?!”  
Her eyes shot open. Had she put something that inflammatory about James in her post? She couldn’t remember anything like that. She heard James stomp angrily across to her open door. His face was bright red, his eyes were wild, and there was a vein popping out of his neck.  
“Is this some kind of joke?!” demanded James through gritted teeth.  
Elaine swallowed and rose to look at the paper he was holding out. She looked for flaws, and, seeing none, tried to read James’s expression instead.  
“James, what-?”  
“No! NO!” James started pointing viciously to the very bottom line, where Cas’s name was signed. Wait. No, not Cas’s name. No…  
“What do you make of this, Elaine?! Is Cas pranking us?! Or have you been keeping the biggest secret of us all?!”  
The hurt and betrayal in James’s voice struck Elaine like physical blows. She felt the tears start to well up in her eyes, her cheeks grew hot, and her throat closed up. She fixed her eyes on the floor, trying to pull herself together, before raising her eyes to meet James’s. He knew the truth instantly.  
“James, you have to understand! This all just got so out of hand!”  
James balled up his copy, threw it at her, and stormed out with a disgusted scowl on his face. Elaine immediately followed after him, not caring if her tears had started to run down her face. She called his name, trying to reason with him, get him to turn around. He finally rounded on her in the middle of their common room.   
“What do you expect to happen here, Elaine? Do you expect me to forgive you? You hurt me, and, even worse, you hurt the people I care about! How could I be so stupid? How could I not see that it was you! It was you the whole time!” James paused and looked down at the floor, his black hair flopping over his brow. “I just – I can’t, Elaine. I can’t talk to you, because I don’t know if I can trust you. I can’t even look at you right now.” He started to walk away and into his bedroom.  
“James! No, James! Please!” She followed, but he slammed his door in her face. She had the good sense not to knock, but instead leaned against the wall next to the door, and slid down until she was sitting in a tucked up little ball, arms wrapped around her legs. She laid her head down on her knees and started sobbing. This was not how it was meant to happen. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end.   
She must have fallen asleep, because the next thing she knew, she was being awoken by a loud knocking at the front door and light beginning to stream in through the windows. Elaine untangled herself, and stood up shakily. Her eyes were dry, her throat was raw, and overall she felt wrung-out and horrible. She stumbled to the door, pulling her hair into a ponytail in the process. The knocking continued until Elaine opened the door.  
On the other side was Lucy, whose eyes narrowed with loathing immediately.  
“Get out,” she ordered, angrily. Elaine felt the tears start again as she stepped aside, let Lucy in, and let herself her shuffled out into the cold morning air. She pulled her dressing gown tightly around herself, checked her pockets for her wand, and decided the best thing for her at that moment was food and coffee.   
Elaine made her way down to the kitchens and passed no one in the halls. She had never been in the kitchens this early before (it was just before 5 am), but hoped they were actually open. She got through the portrait and found the elves beginning to gear up for the day. They smiled and waved at and greeted her as she made her way over to the small tables. It was then that she realized she wasn’t the only witch out and about in the early morning hours.  
“Miss Ilia,” said Headmistress McGonagall. “I thought the days of students coming to the kitchens had died out after the Battle.”  
“No Ma’am,” replied Elaine. She stood awkwardly, suddenly acutely aware of every flaw that gave away her current state of being. She self-consciously smoothed down her hair and clothes.   
“Well, take a seat, Elaine. You’ve already interrupted my morning tea. No sense in sending you away now. Woody!” McGonagall called. A rather tall elf (but, of course, still rather short in comparison to humans) darted forward. “Give the girl whatever she wants. She had a hard night.” Woody nodded and darted away again after Elaine had asked for coffee and hashbrowns.   
“Do you always take your tea in the kitchens, Professor?” murmured Elaine, now seated across from a woman she had considered a role model.  
“Yes, I enjoy the company of the elves. And before your papers came along, I had nowhere else to get all the good gossip. The elves know everything.”   
Elaine reddened and looked at her hands in her lap. “You know about that?”   
“Oh my dear girl. I’ve known ever since last spring that it was you! I’m not completely incompetent. All it required was a sophisticated tracing spell. I kept quiet in the hopes that you would expose yourself in due course and look where we are now.” She added a pinch of sugar to her tea and stirred it before taking a sip.  
“Why would you let it get this far?” asked Elaine. “I said so many terrible things about people I care about so much.”  
“It got out of hand,” said McGonagall. “You were giving the people what they want. If the majority of students (and teachers, I might add) had stopped reading, you would have ceased publishing, because you would have felt like a nuisance. But, if you had stopped publishing when you were popular, you would have felt guilty, as if you were denying them something. People are picky, opinionated, and unpredictable. It is the cycle of print media, Dear.”   
Elaine nodded, but remained silent. She just didn’t know what to do now.


End file.
